To Be A Fly On The Wall

Apparently I jinxed myself with that post about Jake becoming less of a clingy mamma's boy.

So today was the spring party at Jake's preschool, the last big to-do before graduation in May. Since it was the week of Jake's birthday, I had offered to bake cupcakes to contribute to the party as well as stay and help out with the bird feeders they were painting. So we arrive at school and Jake is playing nicely with all of his friends. At the sound of the bell, he helps do his share of the clean-up and finds his favorite spot on the J of the ABC rug only to be crowded by all of his classmates who all want to be next to Jake aka The Birthday Boy. It was pretty cute. The teacher asked several of the kids to fill out the circle to which they each replied that they wanted to be near Jake. So then the teacher asked Jake if he would move but he was firm on staying on the J so she simply moved on lopsided circle and all. After attendance, Jake was called to the front to receive a special birthday sticker to display on his shirt for the duration of class. He was as proud as a peacock. I was able to witness 1 song and dance - The ABC Disco with Jake singing and shaking around when suddenly something clicked in Jake and it was all over. He came over to where I was sitting off to the side with Jadyn and wanted to sit on my lap, sulked when I told him no and refused to rejoin the circle or continue to participate. We had only been in class for 30 minutes.

Right then and there, I had to make a decision. I could selfishly stay in order to see them sing Happy Birthday to Jake and help pass out the cupcakes I was up late frosting or I could leave, knowing that beyond the few minutes Jake might continue to sulk, it would be far less of a distraction then having Jake whine and cling to me, ruining a chance of him actually enjoying his little school party. So I apologized to his teachers, explained that I felt it best to cut my losses and Jadyn and I left. Of course I was disappointed. In fact it almost made me cry. I just don't understand why Jake does this. It's like he sees me and sees me holding Jadyn and can no longer just go about his business of having fun and socializing with his friends. It is the exact reason I pushed for him to be in preschool this year. Because he was the same way at the parent-child interactive program through the YMCA. I knew he knew his stuff - at home he could sing the songs, name off his colors and shapes, count to 20 and recite his ABCs but during circle time he would just sit like a lump in my lap or take off and play, not wanting to do what the other kids were doing at all. It was frustrating.

I am really trying to look at the bright side and there are several points to make in favor of this: 1) At least he is doing well in school. He listens to his teachers, is learning a ton, making friends and socializing and participating and not at all the shy, timid boy he once was. 2) We had an absolute great birthday party and a wonderful quiet birthday with the 4 of us yesterday and 3) I have managed to stay for his Halloween party without incident and at his Christmas party until the very end when he decided to pull the same stunt and 4) At least I got to see a glimpse of his day that first 30 minutes. Watching everyone dote on him and seeing him sing and dance around with his friends was sheer joy for me as a parent.

But oh, I have said many times before. I wish I could be a fly on the wall of that preschool so I could catch perhaps a little more than a glimpse.